"Nirvana- smells like teen spirit"

Load up on guns,


Bring your friends

It's fun to lose and to pretend

She's overboard self assured

Oh no I know, a dirty word.



Hello, hello, hello, hello?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, how low, how low?

Hello, hello, hello.



With the lights out, it's less dangerous

Here we are now, entertain us

i feel stupid and contagious

Here we are now, entertain us

A mulato!

An Albino!

A mosquito!

My libido!

Yay! Hey! Yay!



I'm worse at what I do best

And for this gift I feel blessed

Our little group has always been

And always will until the end



Hello, hello, hello, hello?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, how low, how low?

Hello, hello, hello.



With the lights out, it's less dangerous

Here we are now, entertain us

I feel stupid and contagious

Here we are now, entertain us

A mulato!

An Albino!

A mosquito!

My libido!

Yay! Hey! Yay!



(Solo)



And I forget just why I taste -

Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile

I found it hard, it was hard to find

Oh well, whatever, nevermind



Hello, hello, hello, hello?

Hello, hello, hello, how low?

Hello, hello, how low, how low?

Hello, hello, hello.



With the lights out, it's less dangerous

Here we are now, entertain us

I feel stupid and contagious

Here we are now, entertain us

A mullato!

An albino!

A mosquito!

My libido!

"I should've died in that dream"

I look around me and everything is dark.... the room is pitch black... out of know where my fingers started glowing... and then the rest of my body. I said to myself i had to be dreaming.. or maybe i was just hallucinating from the massive amount of weed i just consumed, but im pretty sure im dreaming. well as im glowing the world around me looks like something directly out of the movie "Avatar" I mean the scenery looked amazing.. but there wasent anyone else here.. i was the only one... but then an army of alien controlled robots surrounded me... deep in my head i was thinking i was going to die... or wake up.. i really didnt know what the hell was going on or what to make of it... i started to levitate and i rose higher everything around me started to look more and more clearer.. this dream or hallucination started to make sense to me everything started to really come together.. as i looked around i started to see my thoughts everything that i think about .. but im seeing it in a very abstract and visual sense. Like everything from my head was brought to life... the robots.. the aliens... the love... the hate... the drugs... the amazing world i created... even death.. and the end of time.. as im looking directly at all my thoughts they seem to be in a battle with each other... the good thoughts vs. the bad... the love vs. the hate... the pain vs. the happiness, the aliens vs. the robots everything was at war. and i was at the center.. just seeing all my thoughts amazed me i wasent even paying attention to the fact that i was at war with myself...... as i fly around the world i created and see all the fucked up thoughts and all the loneliness and the tears i shed all the time... i can blatantly see that i need help or at least a good friend because inside im dying of despair my emotions are on fire .... my thoughts are at war and my philosophy is grounded i am truely losing my sanity one fucked up thought at a time... but what can i do about that.. how can i change it.... I CANT... in the dream/hallucination a huge nuclear explosion took place and everything was destroyed "I should've died in that dream" along with my inner self but i didnt i was still alive until i woke up... or went back to reality.............

"Dancing With Dandylions"

Ten seconds of wind blowing from my mouth and pain and misery is replaced with joy and happiness. So now I can dance with dandy lions instead of the devil. Instead of tears falling from my face, little seeds that i call happy helicopter men of joy, float threw the sky, sometimes I wonder if one of those helicopter men could send a message to someone, a person, a girl,. Because my words, my messages never get through no matter how hard I try.. Dancing with the dandy lions could be much bette. if me plus one where dancing together with the dandy lions. But those are just wishes, most of the time and wishes for me dont come true, who suppose to be granting those anyway, because I think they just ignore my request. The dandy lions are truely amazing they help me they distract me from my pain, from all my loneliness. The happy helicopter men are my role models I aspire to be like them one day, and I also hope that one day the message could be sent to that girl.

"Painful reality"

i feel so isolated so perplexed... SOLITUDE has me engrossed.... im drowning in an ocean of pain and agony the waves hit me with cruel force knocking all the hope and fertility right out of me. I cry for help... but its never loud enough... DESPAIR.... the people around me dont notice im happy about because even if they did notice they wouldent be able to do anything about it.... i conceal myself or at least try to.... my black cold cold heart is weary....being broken donw down by reality every time i feel as though... i am o.k..... the philosophy of my brain is so subtle that not even the greatest mind can understand i want to be happy but it seems as though that is an impossible feat.

"your beauty"

your face, you spirit

your body, your eyes, your soul

your heart, your mind, your skin it shines

your touch....... your smile.... your

lips your legs... all resemble beauty

the highest level of it

your soul.. your amazing soul

its wonderful it shows your character... its

love filled... filled with love that....

makes me feel amazing

your eyes,....... i could stare at them for an eternity

your the only girl for me

your body sexi legs that i could drown in

your slim and slinder ... perfect

but back to your soul.. why is it so great??

i dont know.. you dont know.. it just is

your love your love.. and your loved

"That State"

It only happens at night.. when everyone else is sleep and i've been laying there trying to go to sleep.. something weird happens to me.. I become afraid of myself. Like im scared that im going to do something to myself or to someone else in the house. Then i cry... i seem to be doing that allot more lately i even cry in school now.. i have to ask my teacher can i use the bathroom when every i feel that i might cry.. but it happens more at lunch time on even days. Sitting by myself at that table.. i dont have to sit by myself i guess but i choose to, because if i sit with any of those people at that school that dont get me.. it just makes me even more angry. I cry at lunch allot.. i try as hard as i can not to show it though.. the reason i cry is because when im in that state.. its like i have no one.. just myself.. like theres no one else around that can pull me away from it.. from the pain.. from the agony.. a friend a good friend.. i dont have that.. the one friend that i do have dont feel to comfortable around me so i dont really wanna force her to help.... but i wonder can she see it.. i wonder can she see that im not o.k. that im a troubled kid.. just saying that im a troubled kid makes me cry...

i used to smoke allot.. you know cigs and weed but i dont now cause that just makes me feel more crappy.. i used to fuel my loneliness with artificial happiness like sex and weed but it doesent work anymore it just adds to the fact that im not o.k. this is the worse i have ever felt this is the loneliest i have ever felt in my entire life... nothing seems to work out for me especially girls.... girls never work out for me ever.. when ever i think that i've met a good girl she turns out to be the opposite.. i ask god for his help all the time i attempt to talk to my mom about it but i kno that she gone say everything gone be alright when i kno that its not.. .. nothing works for me nothing helps me anymore not even her face... her beautiful light skinned face.. "Shaina" thats her name thats the person that knows me the best... shes my best friend and the reason i say that is because i can tell her anything.. even if she dont trust me enough to tell me anything.... but she has friends of her own.. im not her only friend.. and plus she has a boy friend. who she spends lots of time with.. but even she dont feel comfortable around me.. because she says she "Cheated on her boy friend with me" so i really dont talk to her as much

i love her i cant just stop myself from loving her.. when im around her i feel awesome like my loneliness is blessed by this girl.. or that she have saved me.. all i could do is smile when i see her .. but she doesent love me.. i guess she does as a friend.. but i dont feel that way around her anymore.. she doesent make me smile like she used to... in ways it feel like she pushed me away fro her so i dont really try to get to envolved with her much.. because i dont wanna cause any trouble i guess... i cant help feeling like this.... and its weird because i started writing this in that state but now that im finished i feel o.k. WOW thing just get weirder and weirder..

"In my dreams"